As I have previously mentioned, I am exceptionally single.  Trust me, it is not for the lack of trying.  God has just not given me that special person yet.  I have had a few close calls with a ton of potential. They had intense connections and solid relationships either established or in the works.  It is possible that this is all on my mind because I had yet another let down a few days ago. This one did not do anything wrong and he was an exceptional gentleman.  A truly great person.  It breaks my heart that we couldn’t go longer than a short couple of weeks.  Disappointment like this always sends me down a deep and dark path where I tend to question my worth.  This time, I refused to let the depressive thoughts consume me.  I did allow myself to grieve for a day or so, but I quickly forced myself to just trust God and know that this is all a piece of His divine plan.

With all of that being said, it is probably pretty obvious that I have tried many different methods of dating.  I’ve had my go online (free and subscription), blind dates, church groups, friends of friends… the list goes on.  I am sure that you can only imagine some of the stories I must have.  Let me tell you, I have some doozies.  I thought it might be fun to give you all a good laugh so I am going to tell you some of my favorites.  I assure you, they are all true.  I do not have the capacity to make some of these up! The only thing that will be left out will be real names.  I hope you enjoy these little stories from my dating adventures.

The Cubs Fan

Taking us back to 2016 when the Chicago Cubs were finally getting their chance to play in a World Series.  Just prior to this guy, I had been tragically (and quite unexpectedly) dumped and was still suffering from the aftermath.  I am blaming my lapse of judgement on that fact!  I met Cubs Guy on Bumble.  We talked quite a bit through messenger and we had a lot in common.  We both loved the cubs, our dogs, and being outdoors.  Obviously, the ideal date would include our interests.  We decided to meet at Eagle Creek Reservoir to walk our dogs. Here comes the first red flag…. Dixie hated him!  Let me tell you, if a dog thinks you are a bad person, you probably are!  This guy was also afraid of my gentle giant and kept making rude comments about how Dixie would hurt his dog (I hope you can sense my eye roll here).  We survived our 3 mile hike and parted ways.  Cubs Guy was a Chicago Cubs season ticket holder.  Remember, this is the biggest season in over a century!  This fool sold his World Series tickets, ALL OF THEM, because he said “they were just going to lose so what’s the point?”.  Wait, what!?!?  You have the golden ticket in your hand to literally witness history and you could care less?!?!  He was a self-confessed super fan.  Yeah, I don’t think so. That marked the end of the Cubs guy.

The Moe’s Man

In spring of 2017, I matched with this one on Bumble as well.  He seemed too old for me but I entertained the idea of meeting him after work.  He made me choose the time and location and was adamant that I had to make the decisions.  Ok, fine.  I am a planner, so I will take the reigns here.  We met at Moe’s Irish Pub.  He insisted on sitting at a bar high top rather than getting an actual table which created an extremely awkward setting to try and talk.  When the waiter came over my date tried to order me a drink and then became annoyed that I only wanted water.  When it was time to order food, this “gentleman” proceeded to pick and order what he thought I should have!  Excuse me?!?!  Totally not ok.  You just met me.  Why on earth would you think that you can order my dinner?  The meal was painful.  It was all I could do to not be rude and just excuse myself.  Throughout dinner I got to hear all about his ex-wife and her inadequacies. The conversation made it crystal clear that he had unattainably high expectations.  He then went on to tell me that women should not hold positions of power and that a woman as a manager was a joke. At this time, I was a healthcare manager, a very successful one.  As we were leaving, I told him that he obviously could not handle a strong-willed woman and that we would not be seeing each other again.  He had thought the date went wonderfully, which was even more confusing!

Exotic BMW owner

This one will be short and sweet.  This was the second person I went on a date with after my ended engagement.  I met him on eHarmoney.  When we actually met in person, he was about 5 inches shorter than his profile stated.  He lived with his parents (in their basement).  I discovered that he had no Driver’s License due to having too many speeding tickets, no car insurance, and then a DUI (just to add the cherry on top).  I am sure you can imagine how that conversation went after I learned all of this.

The Disappearing Act

I met him in January this past winter.  He was a smooth talker and not my type in the least, but I had not had any luck with the men that I thought were my type so I figured I would give it a try.  He definitely wine and dined me.  Took me on the nicest dates I have ever been on in my life.  This was all great. However, 3 weeks in he started to talk about me selling my house and moving in with him!  Whoa, slow down buddy.  I took it just as over eager, the same way his entire personality was.  We made it 3 months before he randomly dropped off the face of the earth.  After all of that, he ghosted me!  Was gone, completely.  No explanation.  No goodbye.  Just gone.  It was the strangest thing.

The Dachshund Lover

Oh this guy.  I am just shaking my head thinking about him.  He was very recent.  I met him on Match at the end of April.  He owned 2 long hair, very adorable, dachshunds and was a total dog lover.  Big plus, or so I thought.  He was so fascinated with my love of sports and the outdoors.  (Yes, I know that I am a strange woman.)  So many stories came from the short 2.5 weeks that was our time together.  I’ll just tell you a few. 

  1. He brought his dogs over to my house and then persisted to freak out any time my large Great Dane got too close to them.  Insert giant eye roll here.
  2. I was completely conned into taking him to a Cubs game in Cincinnati where I paid for the ENTIRE thing.  We are talking about basically all aspects.  We drove my car, the gas to travel there and back, some of the food, and the amazing seats behind the 3rd base dugout.  This is all after he tells me “the cost doesn’t matter”.  Exactly, because you expected me to pay for the entire thing!
  3. Lastly and certainly not least, he basically invites himself to my sister’s birthday party.  When I get into his truck (because he insisted on driving) this fool has PORN playing on his phone that connects to his truck’s blue tooth speakers.  What. The. Actual. Heck!

You may be asking why I let that one last more than 1 or 2 dates.  I have no idea! Maybe I was lonely or maybe a part of me felt like I was being too harsh.  I have no clue!  It did leave me with a very comical story, no matter how frustrating it may have been.

From all of the madness that is dating in our world today, I have learned very valuable lessons.  I certainly try to find the humor in the process. Perhaps the most important lesson is, IF YOUR DOG DOESN’T LIKE SOMEONE—TRUST THEM!  My dog tends to be a far better judge of character than I am.  All kidding aside, family comes first.  They will always be your family, don’t let someone try to come between you and them. I have also had a few that have attempted to involve my friends in the breakup.  This makes absolutely no sense to me.  If they really are my friends, I win, every time. 

Even though I have had a wild ride trying to find my person, I am not giving up.  I believe in my heart that God did not create us to be alone.  I used to think that God was ignoring my prayers.  That they didn’t matter.  I know now that I am not being ignored but being told to wait.  I also think that I am learning powerful lessons in this chapter of my life.  If I would have been in a serious relationship prior to getting my heart right with God, I may never have stayed committed to my faith journey.  I must realize that God always comes first and that he also needs to remain in the center of whatever relationship that I do end up in.  I have read several books regarding this topic and there are a few golden nuggets that I have pulled from them.  An important one, that I should be praying for the one that will eventually end up in my life.  No, I do not know who that will be or when it will happen, but I do believe that in God’s timing it will.  I do pray (almost daily) that God will straighten my future husband’s path towards me.  That he will bless the road that he is walking on and keep him in His favor.  Someday, I hope that I can look into my love’s eyes and tell him this.

This is the big, bad, and scary pup that the previously mentioned men were afraid of. Obviously, she is terrifying.

Published by Kimberly

Hello! Let me introduce myself. My name is Kimberly. I am a single, Christian, dog mom of 3. Living my life trying to be the best version of myself and the person that God created me to be. A few of my favorite things include French Macarons, Disney World, Chicago Cubs baseball, and all things Christmas. It's lovely to meet you and I hope that we will become life-long friends!

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